The Love We Deserve

September 1, 2024 Fifteenth Sunday after Pentecost
Ladue Chapel Presbyterian Church
Psalm 45:1-2, 6-9Song of Solomon 2:8-13
"The Love You Deserve"
Courtney M. Chandler


It was a little over a year ago that he walked into Arrowhead Stadium in Kansas City with a friendship bracelet and a dream.  Travis Kelce, tight end for the Kansas City Chiefs, walked into that stadium to see Taylor Swift in concert. He tried to meet her, but wasn’t allowed backstage. So he asked someone to give her a friendship bracelet he made with his phone number on it and a note that said, “I watched you rock Arrowhead Stadium, maybe one day you can come to a game and watch me rock Arrowhead.”  He talked about his disappointment of not being able to meet Swift on the podcast he does with his brother.  A few short months later, the nation watched as Taylor Swift entered Arrowhead Stadium to watch the Kansas City Chiefs play.  

Swifties around the world would swoon as they watched Travis Kelce’s eyes light up and watched him smile as he saw Taylor Swift on the jumbotron and he said, “There she is…”  

For Swifties, mothers of swifties, grandmother’s of swifties, even dads and reluctant brothers, we all began to watch this love story unfold.  Even those who don’t like Taylor Swift OR Travis Kelce have been made aware of their love story.  

Why are we so obsessed with their story? I have a theory. I will share that in a bit.  But first, I want to look at another love story.  The love story found in the midst of the Hebrew Bible. The book we read and people ask, “What is this doing in here?” I want us to look at the Song of Solomon, which is also referred to as The Song of Songs, which is my preferred name for the book.  Because I think when we call it, “Song of Songs,” It is saying to us that there is no song greater than this one…it is the Song of all Songs. 

This short book only comes up in the Revised Common Lectionary once and it is always around the first week in September, which is strange since the text talks about the end of winter and the first signs of spring and here we are at the end of summer and about to enter into fall.  But no one asked me so here we are. 

I wish we would explore this book more often. It is truly beautiful to read.  I have often wondered why this book is not read more.  Perhaps the language makes us uncomfortable. It is extremely sexual in nature and we are often uncomfortable with language that surrounds that type of intimacy. It is very romantic and is almost like a romance novel in the middle of the bible. Some of us don’t like romance novels, even though this is a very different type of romance. It is not like many books where one person has control over the other. Instead this is a love that is consensual and where both parties show mutual love and respect. In fact, the female has the stronger voice and it is clear that she has complete control over her own body and desires. This story is about love and the anticipation of love.  It may be about some other things, but we’ll get to that in a moment as well.
 
I hope you will read this book on your own, revisit it if you have not read it in a while, but in case you don’t let me share some lines from this Song of Songs.  

The woman says, “I am my beloved and my beloved is mine,” which is often used as a reading in Jewish wedding ceremonies. 

The woman speaks, “I sought him whom my soul loves…I found him, whom my soul loves…I held him and would not let him go.”
 
The man says to his beloved, “You are altogether beautiful my love; there is no flaw in you. You have ravished my heart with a glance of your eyes.”  That will melt your heart. 

Later it says, “Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm; for love is strong as death, passion fierce as the grave.”

And finally, “I was in his eyes as one who brings peace.” 

How lovely is this book?  Who doesn’t want to be a part of a love like this?  And yet we find ourselves often asking, “Why is this in the bible? What does it mean?”

While we are not certain when this book was written, its language and vocabulary suggests it was created during the Post-Exilic period, sometime in the 3rd century BCE. While it is attributed to King Solomon, most scholars believe this is untrue.  Some believe the writer was most likely a woman because the woman’s voice is the prominent voice in this book.  Also, it refers to her mother’s house instead of her father’s house, which is most common in the Hebrew Bible. 

As I said earlier, parts of this text are traditionally used in Jewish wedding ceremonies, but also, because of the images of spring, it is used in the Jewish tradition as readings during Passover. Which is a reminder of new beginnings and new life. 

In our text we read today we hear the anticipation of the woman who sees her lover coming over the hills and when he arrives he pauses at the gate.  It’s as if he needs to take a moment, a breath, before he summons her to join him.  He tells her the winter is over. The rain is gone and calls to her, “Arise and come away.”  It’s as if the bad times are coming to an end and a new day has dawned. It’s as if the symbolism of the spring is all he needs to remind her that he is eager to start a new day, a new life, with her as his beloved. And I guess we don’t have to read that just in the spring, because God is capable of doing new things during any and all seasons. 

I said I think there is a reason that people gravitate towards the story of Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift. Here are my thoughts: We are living in a time that feels bleak.  During the Covid shut down, it was awful. It was difficult; however, there were moments of greatness that we witnessed thanks to the internet.  I remember watching a video of someone playing music on their balcony in Italy and folks sitting in their windows listening to the music and letting the sounds of the violin float into their homes.  People found ways to express themselves through art and poetry.  There were videos of dancers practicing in empty streets and people watching from their homes.  People got out and walked and exercised.  In India, people could see the peaks of the Himalayas for the first time in years because the pollution levels had dropped enough to see them.  So as dark as that time seemed to be, we found ways to let music and the arts and creation and fresh air feed our souls. We longed for friendships and people to spend time with.  We longed to hug one another and it made us more aware of the small things in life we take for granted.  

Once we went back to work and “normal” things seemed to get out of hand.  That was just 4 short years ago and most of us are back to life as usual.  Who has time for art and poetry? And then the humans of the world decided to rear their ugly heads and we have the war in Ukraine, the ongoing conflict between Palestine and Israel, and now in Afghanistan it is illegal for women to be seen or heard in public. And these are just a few of the things happening in our world.  

We are bombarded with bleakness. Images on the internet and our media outlets are constantly showing a world of division and a world of hate.  And so I think the reason some people, I realize it’s not everyone, but some people are so intrigued with the relationship of Kelce and Swift is because people are desperate for a good love story.  A story where two people are in love and are equals and have mutual respect for one another. A love story where we witness a playful romance. Where two people light up when they see one another and don’t care if you love them or hate them, they are in it for each other. And so we gravitate towards that, because we long for it.  We need to be reminded that love is greater than the bleakness of the world.  We need to be reminded that winter will be over, the rain will end and a new day is waiting for us.
 
And as much as I love to watch the Taylor Swift/Travis Kelce romance unfold with my sweet daughter, I have to say, as a person of faith, I shouldn’t have to focus on their love story when I am a part of a great love story myself. 

Some have said the reason Song of Solomon can be found in the bible is because it is the love story of Ywheh with the Israelites. Some also say it can be interpreted as Jesus and his beloved Church. Now, I don’t know if that is true. I certainly don’t think the writer of this book had Jesus in mind when they wrote it, but I do think we can see a connection between God and God’s people and therefore we can see how this may play out as a connection between Christ and Christ's church.

Let’s say this is about God and God's people.  If this is the case then God is longing for an intimate, playful relationship with us. When we approach God, we should pause with anticipation at what God will do next in our lives.  But in order to have this relationship with God, we have to allow ourselves to be open and vulnerable with God. We have to allow God into the places we try to keep closed off.  Just as we have to work on our relationships with the partners we have in our lives, we have to work on the relationship with God.  

Let’s say this is about Christ and his church.  Do we, when we come together, think of ways in which we can celebrate who we are as followers of christ?  Do we give of our whole selves, to the one who gave everything for us?  I have to say that as far as congregations go, we seem to do a pretty good job at finding ways to play together. Next Sunday is Rally Day and we will have a band and a magician and balloon animals and food.  So I think we have moments of celebration and joy, but are we willing to open our hearts and minds to a more intimate relationship with each other so we can continue to build on our spiritual growth as a faith community?   Do we pause before we enter into worship and do we enter with eager anticipation of experiencing time with the divine? Or do we just show up and go through the motions? And if we are not willing to be more intimate with the God who created us or with our faith community, I have to ask why? 

Perhaps we don’t feel comfortable with this kind of love? Perhaps we don’t feel deserving of a love that is this powerful. 

In my Chapel Bell article this week I shared with you all how I learned of the quote, “You accept the love you think you deserve.”In case you missed that article, the quote is from the novel and movie titled, “The Perks of Being a Wallflower.”  Friends, in case you are wondering, we deserve the love story. We deserve to be reminded that there is love and there is light and there is hope.  We deserve to be in relationships that share mutual love and respect.  We deserve to experience the divine and to know that God looks at us with loving eyes. We deserve to know that Christ is calling us to arise and come.  We deserve to be part of a community that holds one another close and loves each other. We deserve to know that we loved beyond measure. We deserve to know that God is constantly doing a new thing….sometimes, we have to seek out the one our soul loves and I am hoping that our soul loves the God who created us and breathed life into us and that our soul loves the one who lived and died for us so we may be raised to new life through him. This is the love we deserve. Look for the signs of new life and new beginnings and find ways to allow yourselves to fall in love with your partner, your family, your faith communities and mostly your God, Christ and the Holy Spirit. It's hard for us to see ourselves as worthy of this magical, playful, beautiful type of unconditional love. But we were created for this and here is our reminder we deserve to love and be loved. 

Amen.

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