March 8, 2026 - Third Sunday in Lent: Ego vs. Theo

March 8, 2026 Third Sunday in Lent
Ladue Chapel Presbyterian Church
John 4:5-15Exodus 17:1-7
“Ego vs. Theo”
Melissa K. Smith

I grew up in a drought. Rationing water by watering lawns at night only twice a week was normal and I remember being told that it’s good if your lawn resembles “California gold”. Many people opted to change their gardens into “desert gardens” opting for rocks instead of grass and varying forms of cacti and desert plants instead of flowers.

When I moved to Spokane, Washington for college, I was the annoying freshman that ran to every sink in the bathroom and turned off the faucet when people were brushing their teeth. The thought that they just let water run for two whole minutes was ludicrous.

We were taught that if we had to drive through the Mojave Desert we needed to have a gallon of water in the car per person, our cars had to be serviced and the cooling system checked, and if you dared drive through in the summer you had to plan your drive for way early in the morning or after sunset so we could avoid extreme heat.

Heat and no water are a dangerous combination. Most people can survive without water for three to five days, but if you’re in a situation where you don’t have shelter and you’re in intense heat, that timeline is even shorter. With that context it normalizes the Israelite’s frustration… no water is serious business.

It’s easy to criticize the Israelites. They complain…a lot. In just the previous chapter in Exodus the Israelites cry out, “If only we had died by the hand of the Lord in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the pots of meat and ate our fill of bread, for you have brought us out into this wilderness to kill this whole assembly with hunger.” It would be easy to pass this off as the Israelites being “hangry” – but it’s so much more than that.

They are scared. They are in the wilderness, the desert, taking the long route to the promised land. They have just fled for their lives, run through the red sea, and find themselves in a new context with nothing. Not even food. They cried out to God, they brought their anger, their frustration, their worry, and their fear to God. They lamented.

And they weren’t punished for crying out, they weren’t lambasted for their harsh words. Instead, Moses and God heard them. God responded by being present with them and providing manna and quail. God was intentionally present and generously provided for them. The Israelites never went without food for forty years.

But they are human, and eventually they became very, very thirsty. They said, “Give us water to drink…why did you bring us out of Egypt, to kill us and our children and our livestock with thirst?” And again, God listened to their cry. God told Moses to take the staff he struck the Nile river with – a sign of God’s saving presence in the lives of the Israelites – and strike a rock.  Water will flow. And Moses struck the rock, water flowed, but what is recorded in scripture is not the overwhelming joy of God’s provision. What is mentioned is their resounding question: “Is the Lord among us or not?”

Again, it is easy to criticize the Israelites. God has clearly been among them. He saved them from slavery in Egypt, he freed them from the Pharaoh, he split a sea so they could cross it in haste. God provided food – both manna and meat – and now he is providing water. What do you mean, “Is the Lord among us or not?” And beyond what God has provided – God has been incredibly present. God has shown up in pillars of fire by night and air by day. God has been with Moses. God has been and is among them.

But in their fear, in their frustration, in their anger, they turned inwards, focusing on themselves. They were ego-centric “what has God done for me today? Certainly he hasn’t given me anything to drink”. They were not theo-centric. They lost sight of God even though he was right in front of them, beside them, and with them the whole time.

The woman at the well approaches the matter of thirst not from fear but from skepticism. She is getting her water in the middle of the day – and no one gets water in the middle of the day. It’s far too hot. But as she goes, she encounters Jesus. In the midst of their discussion Jesus tells her about living water. And she wants to know where that water can be found because the thought of never being thirsty again, of never having to come to the well in the middle of the day because of societal insecurity…that’s so appealing. Her desire is ego-centric, “Sir, give me this water so that I may never be thirsty or have to keep coming here to draw more water.” She has skipped over Jesus’ words that “if you knew the gift of God and who it is that is saying to you, ‘Give me a drink,’ you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.”

Ego vs. Theo

In both these instances, ego is not arrogance, but is rather the posture of being consumed by our own immediate needs, fears, and interpretations.

In the desert the Israelites can only see the desert. Their thirst becomes proof to them that God abandoned them and left them to die. In their fear their memory of God’s providence and provision through the plagues, the sea, and the manna is gone. Their only lens for understanding their situation is a lens of suffering.

At the well, the woman is focused on what she can understand. She and Jesus are almost having two different conversations. He is talking about living water and she is very aware of his lack of a bucket, the depth of the well, and is trying to be practical and logical in how to get water.

Ego in this sense is a narrow focus on what we can see and measure empirically. But when this type of ego dominates our perspective, scarcity becomes the plot, fear becomes the narrator, and we lose sight of God altogether.

Ego vs. Theo

In Greek, the root word “theos” means God. So theo in today’s sermon is referring to God-centered vision. The Israelites and the Samaritan Woman were, at least at one point, ego-centric in their vision. They lost sight of God. But we are called to be theo-centric.

In both of these passages, God is already present; even before anyone recognizes it. In Exodus 17 God says to Moses, “I will be standing there in front of you on the rock at Horeb.” Before the water comes, God is already there. The people think God is not among them. They think he abandoned them, leaving them to die. God was with them. They were never alone.

At the well, Jesus says to the woman, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that is speaking to you…” The living water is already speaking to her – no buckets needed.

Theo-centric vision reminds us that God’s presence is not dependent on our awareness of God. Thank goodness.

Both of these passages, beyond their similarity in being ego-centric, focus on the theme of thirst. Thirst is a reality we all know, and it can take form both physically and spiritually. Physical thirst leads to panic. In dehydration, the body tries to conserve water by shrinking cells and reducing blood pressure, affecting mental alertness and coordination. That is certainly panic inducing.

Spiritual thirst is a soul-level craving for connection with God. It is something that cannot be quenched by worldly pleasures, it can only be quenched by growing in relationship with God. Spiritual thirst feels like doubt. “Is God really among us?” “I can’t feel God’s love in this season, perhaps God has left me.” “Does God care about me anymore?”

What these two passages show us is that God is always with us and he shows up in the midst of our thirst, inviting us to be quenched in body and soul as we say yes to his invitation into relationship.

The Israelites were really thirsty. The woman did have to navigate a deep well. What each of you are going through this Lenten season is valid and real. God’s invitation to take the living water, to see that he is before us even before his provision, does not negate the realities we are navigating. Rather, we are being invited to change our perspective, to shift from ego to theo and see that God has been standing with us the whole time.

We’re human. We complain. We argue. We have an ego-centric vision.

This Lenten season, let us take a step back, expand our viewfinders, and be ready for our perspectives to be changed as we realize that God is already here and perhaps we will see the ways God has provided for us in the midst of our fear, doubt, and skepticism.

Thanks be to God. Amen.